Tarah with one of her nurses on a tough chemo day. (May 2013)

Hopefully you will never be or have someone close diagnosed with Cancer, but f you find yourself in that position focus on these silver linings; Cancer affords families with perspective, and allows for insight into the futility of things great emphasis is often placed. For example importance of houses, cars, status, and appearance, but when fighting Cancer hopefully you can see how in reality these things are insignificant. Cancer brings with it realization that stress; conflicts, bad drivers, running late, work woes, and other problems, are moments we long for, along with health, but not things deserving the stress we have given them. 

During this battle,  I continually heard my husband say the only thing that matters is “you, God, and family/close friends, the rest we don’t worry about”. With our daily stress, and problems which seemingly compound by the hour, how can someone simply not worry, and how can I  put God and myself first? As I’ve battled and endured treatment for Stage IV Ovarian Cancer I’ve, not always successfully maintained my stress levels, but attempted to by reminding myself each day about what’s important. For myself I found I can’t simply think about what I am thankful for, because the mind is tricky. In the midst of attempts to remain thankful I get caught up in the worry we all succumb to at times, and often rightfully so.  To achieve a full spirit of thankfulness I’ve found writing down or saying out loud at least five things I am  thankful for each day has the ability to turn doom and gloom into a reminder of the blessings I’ve been afforded even when feeling crummy. Despite how bad things are, or how worrisome things have been, through thoughtfulness I was always able to find at least five things to be thankful for; the right nurse on a tough chemo day, family who sacrificed time to sit with me, doctors who invest their energy in research for a cure, and moments to appreciate my surroundings.

Sisters, Mom and Tarah  celebrating being together and  Tarah’s graduation with her MSW (2013).

For those reading this who know someone battling Cancer, and are onlookers of the devastation, don’t wait too long before you take action. Feel free to take it upon yourself to do something for someone who is struggling, because you are mindful asking for help is not always easy. Be thoughtful in how you proceed in helping patients and families, but don’t be pushy, or feel accomplished by the simple extension of, “Call me if you need me”. Patients and families don’t need words or sympathetic smiles, they might just need a hug or a kind gesture.